• Blissful Beginnings Doula

Pregnancy and Infant Loss Rememberence Day

Today, October 15, is pregnancy and infant loss remembrance day.  Sadly, it’s the first year this day has meant anything to me.  We recently lost a baby to miscarriage, and I have to admit that it was a lot harder to deal with than I expected it to be!  The CDC estimates that about 15% of all pregnancies end in miscarriage or stillbirth, a number I believe should probably be higher because many women don’t even realize they’re pregnant by the time they miscarry.Suffering from a miscarriage is devastating to a mom and dad, and each have to cope in their own ways.  Feelings of loss, guilt, sadness, depression are common, and many women cope with the pain alone.  Coming to terms with a loss is not a quick or easy process, and it should be each mother’s right to deal with her pain on her own terms.  Telling her to “get over it,” “you can try again later,” or “it’s for the best” are hurtful statements that can only send a mom into a deeper depression and leave her feeling worse.  Instead, offer her prayers, a hug, or a sincere, “I’m so sorry for your loss.”

Today I remember my baby, Samuel, and my friends who have miscarried and have suffered because of it.  Tonight I will light a candle in their memories, and offer prayers for the men and women who still have yet to come to terms with their loss.

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